TRIAD and Psychology
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The core of TRIAD psychology is conscience. Conscience in that part of
our inner being, that which we call our ‘self’, or our soul, that causes
us to do that which is right or good -- even when no one else is
watching.
Still, conscience appears to be the ability to see ourselves from the
point of view of another person. Some will say that conscience is
instilled in the soul by God and others will say that it arises through
cultural training. For our purposes here, we will accept the latter for
the lower TRIAD levels and, for the few who pursue what we call the
4th-dimensional TRIAD, they can seek the former. In any case, conscience "is one of the private possessions of the heart and the soul." Someone who depends upon what others say for his opinion of what is right or wrong is but an imitator and has no will of his own. Conscience can be developed or destroyed. Destruction of conscience is destruction of the soul itself. One of the most destructive destroyers of the soul is drugs and this is their great evil. For those who do not believe in the existence of the soul, that argument is lost upon them. The goal of the higher TRIADs is to increase conscience, to increase awareness of what is good and how it may be attained. Insight is a gift but, like other gifts and talents, it may be trained, developed and disciplined. TRIADs are an excellent tool for doing so. God may be watching you, but many/most people are more concerned that their neighbors are watching them. They may not be able to pull their blinds on God but they do on their neighbors, and feel what they do in secret is hidden. It is human nature that we not only try to conceal our conscience from others, but also from ourselves. Very often we just keep ourselves very busy, sometimes to the point of exhaustion, with work or entertainment so that we don't have to listen to our conscience. Few people regularly take the time to sit down, meditate, and examine their conscience. Some will do almost anything to avoid doing so, all the way from continuously playing loud music to drown it out or using alcohol or drugs. TRIADs can be used as a conscious tool to train and develop the conscience. The reason is, that it is easier to 'see the mote in another's eye than the log in one's own'. While it is true that we shouldn't go about gratuitously criticizing others, it is often beneficial to have another look into our own eyes, or conscience, as an aid to removing the specks. It is really for this reason that some people go to psychiatrists, counselors, and psychoanalysts. On the premise used here for all but the 4th- Dimensional TRIAD, that our conscience is culturally developed and trained by our parents, teachers and the society around us, it is these influences that we shall also use to improve it. However, in the TRIAD we make a conscious decision about this rather than it occurring randomly, as is generally the case in life where we have no choice about our parents and little choice about our teachers and the others who often influence our lives. The more tightly we bind ourselves to a TRIAD, the more closely we knit the activities of our lives into the higher levels of the TRIAD practice. By intentionally observing the motives and actions of our TRIAD partners and encouraging them to strive for greater virtues and having them intentionally observing and critiquing our thoughts and actions and likewise encouraging us to greater virtues, the more we will be continuously aware of what we are doing. Thus shall we gain insight into our own selves. This is called ‘increasing maturity’. It means that we are living life more fully, being here now and fulfilling the purpose of life. It will also mean that we will be more successful in whatever we are supposed to accomplish. It is this simple point, that we have elected in the TRIAD to have others consciously monitor our conscience, our motives, our insights, our actions, our habits. This form of TRIADic activity is actually a form of psychoanalysis. Psychoanalysis is often painful, but necessary to the examined life. It is not then easy to turn up the music and to ignore life. Facing life directly on, one will then have a much better chance of succeeding. Moreover, in a TRIAD properly conducted, one gains the exceedingly great leverage of the power of consultation. It is a gradual process. One should not jump immediately into the deep end of the pool. Learning to TRIAD can start out very simply such as making introductions and connections at a conference. It can be for any one of many special purposes. The initial purpose in this book is to have the support, skills and insight of others in preparing for disastrous times. As one gains experience in TRIADing they can seek out others with whom they can progress on to the higher levels. Progress to the higher levels of TRIADing will not just happen accidently. It will take intentional effort to seek out partners with whom one can do such TRIADing and it will take intentional effort on the part of all the partners to learn and practice the techniques involved. Merely knowing that one has two TRIAD partners who are going to critique their attitudes and actions, to be external eyes of conscience on matters more personal that we generally hide by the mask that we show the public, will sharpen our own internal eyes of conscience and lead to our spiritual growth, our personal maturity and our success in achieving whatever goals we may set for ourselves. It is essential, in a TRIAD relationship, that the individuals critiquing us be empathetic. Empathy is the capacity to recognize and, to some extent, share feelings (such as sadness or happiness) that are being experienced by another person. Broader definitions may extend the meaning on to sharing or understanding feelings in other sentient beings. I certainly feel empathy with our dog if it is suffering and it appears to me that the dog likewise expresses empathy when one of the family is hurt. However, we are not going to form TRIADs with animals. Wikipedia states that: Empathy is the key cornerstone in genuine human relationships. I suppose that may require one to determine/define the difference between genuine human relationships and non-genuine human relationships. There are many human relationships in which I see a lack of empathy. A prison guard may have no empathy for his prisoners but still perform his task in exactly the same way as one who does have empathy. On the other hand, because of the lack of empathy, a guard may also be brutal and even a torturer. Many people perform their tasks regarding others without empathy. We often think this true of tax collectors, bureaucrats and many others in our daily lives who will tell you that they are 'simply doing their job'. Again, this is not to say that they can't have empathy while still having to do their task, but simply that it seems that many do not. There is a human relationship between opposing warriors seeking to kill each other and between rapists and their victims. I think it goes too far to say that there is no relationship there. Rather it is, albeit a human relationship, one on the dark side. Others may say those individuals lack humanity, (unless, of course, they are our own 'patriotic' soldiers). Nevertheless, empathy is the key cornerstone in TRIAD relationships so, by the Wikipedia definition, TRIAD relationships are genuine human relationships. In point, I would say that developing empathy and weeding out that which is non-empathetic is one of the key TRIAD activities. We shall certainly address this more fully later. For now we wish to identify those who lack empathy. In infants and very small children this is natural. It is the reason children are without sin. They have not yet developed the empathetic capability to realize that others feel pain as they do. However, the mother soon teaches the child to not bite her breast. As the child matures it learns not to hurt other children or animals and it begins to develop a conscience -- the idea that it is wrong to hurt someone else. We all know that this occurs at various rates and in varying degrees. It is possible for most of us to look back in our lives and remember having done something where we wish we had done 'better'. In a later chapter I detail about some children who never develop a conscience. That is not to say they do not learn what is 'right' and 'wrong'. These are the sociopaths. Some do learn what is expected of them, and many of them will conform exceptionally well. They do what they do, however, out of fear of being caught or out of hope for some gain, rather than some internalized external ideal as to what is 'good'. Good to them is only what they want. There are some who will not conform at all and these individuals generally end up dead, in prison or in institutions for the criminally insane. The damaged soul that lacks empathy is another matter. What traumas cause such damage, the varying degrees of damage that are possible and repairable, are all matters that are beyond the scope of this book. I shall leave it that those with free will and an element of conscience can improve their conscience, if they wish. It could be, since none of us think of ourselves as being perfect, that one of the primary purposes of a TRIAD could be as a means for improving our conscience, empathy, soul. I shall also leave it to the reader to further define for themselves these latter terms. To summarize then, the purpose of this chapter has been to tell you that, for your own personal development and goals, you should seek to form TRIADs with the most empathetic persons that you can find. There is a difference between being empathetic and being sympathetic:
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