Here are the top reasons in order that I suspect that your TRIAD may not be working.
1. All the members of your TRIAD have not read this book and do not
really understand what a TRIAD is and how it is to function.
2. The members of your TRIAD have not all really committed to forming a TRIAD.
3. The members of your TRIAD have not all really agreed upon a defined goal.
4. One of the members opts out, perhaps without telling you.
Think of TRIAD as a game of 'Ring-around-the-rosy'. Three of you join
hands - and around and around you go. If one of you sits down (doesn't
continue to participate) the music stops.
5. Two of the TRIAD members have TEAMed up.
Again, think of TRIAD as a game of 'Ring-around-the-rosy'. Three of you
join hands - and around and around you go. In this case, instead of
going around, two team-up and pull on the other - and the game ends.
This is why teaching teams are not likely to work out in a TRIAD.
6. Having an authority in the TRIAD, that is to say someone in the TRIAD
with the ability to reward or punish another member, more than
obfuscates the purpose of the TRIAD; it forecloses the possibility of a
totally candid and unfettered search for truth and curtails the ability
of the other members to give candid critique of the attitudes of the one
having authority.
7. Another reason your TRIAD may not be working is that you have a sociopath in it.
Sociopaths can be quite social in the sense that they join social
groups. The problem is that they don't have the qualities of empathy
and honesty that are necessary to make a TRIAD work. There is
considerable discussion and explanation about sociopaths in a box at the
bottom of the previous chapter.
8. Most of all, the LIKELY failure a TRIAD will arise from the lack of sufficient empathy and sympathy.
Subtlety of the Snake
by Margaux Herrera
TRIAD Level Rating 0.0
Simon (A) had been granted custody of his 2 daughters, 10-year old
Jennifer (B) and 6-year old Jessica (C), following a nasty divorce from
their mother. Simon had been granted the care for the two girls since
his wife was an addict and had run off with another man.
--------
A-(B.C) "Come on girls, it's late! Time to sleep. I want both of you to just hop into bed with me tonight."
C-A "Yea! Thanks daddy, I love sleeping with you."
A-C "And I love sleeping with you too baby. I love to hug you
and hold you and touch you all over. Just like I used to hold your
mommy."
B-A "Can I just sleep in my bed tonight dad? Jessica can sleep
with me too," Jennifer reluctantly says. Since their mother had left
them, sleeping with their dad had given her an uncomfortable, restless
feeling. The last time they had all slept together, she had woken up in
the middle of night when she felt her dad pulling down her panties.
C-(B/A) "But I want to sleep with daddy!"
B-(C/A) "You can just sleep with me tonight Jess. I'll read your favorite book."
C-B "No, I'll sleep with daddy."
A-(C/B) "It's okay baby, you can sleep with Jennifer tonight.
Only if you want to though. Never mind if I will be lonely in my bed
tonight and I'll miss you oh-so-much."
B-A "No daddy, I always want to be with you. Please read Dr. Seuss tonight okay?"
A-B "Dr. Seuss it is!"
A-(B.C) "Alright girls."
A-B "Jennifer go to your room now and sleep."
A-C "Come on Jess, let's go and lie down in the room." While Dr.
Seuss is being read, Simon slowly caresses the tiny thighs and inner
groin of his daughter.
C-A "Daddy, why do you do that to me all the time?" curiously asks Jessica.
A-C "I miss your mommy so much Jess and, now that she's not here
anymore, I want to show my love for her through you. Do you want daddy
to love you like how I loved your mommy?"
C-A "Yes daddy, I love you too."
A-C "That's a good girl. Promise you won’t ever tell anyone that
I love you the same way I love mommy, okay? It's a secret between me
and you."
C-A "I promise daddy."
|
Analysis of the story:
This story is not really about a TRIAD, even if the father might try to
present it as a 'family' TRIAD. The reason it is not a TRIAD is because
it violates the rules of a TRIAD, that they must not contain an
'authority' figure - in this case the 'father' and that, in effect, the
father and younger daughter had 'teamed' so that the older sister
couldn't intervene.
This is a story as ancient as time. The arguments are cunning just like
the arguments of the snake in Genesis. The father argues:
* "we all miss mother"
* "you know how I miss her and only have you"
* "show love to you like I did mother"
* "close knit family, must be completely secret to outsiders"
* "wouldn't do anything to hurt you"
* "this deeper love will prepare you for the future and someone you may marry someday"
The latter is a rationale on the part of the father but would actually
be threatening to the younger daughter involved in the Electra complex,
because she wants nothing to intervene between her and her father. The
Electra complex is the female counterpart to the male Oedipus complex
named by Freud. In the Electra complex, as proposed by Carl Gustav
Jung, the girl’s psychosexual competition is with the mother for
possession of father. It is considered a normal phase in six year olds
and is worked through by the child patterning after the same sex parent.
Boy buddies with dad - girl with momma , but this is not possible in
the absent mother situation. So the young girl would be threatened by
some other fictitious male and would reply something, "NO! I always
want to be with you, daddy."
The older girl has an inclination to protect her younger sister, but she
may have already been similarly seduced by her father. She would be
cowed by threats that if anyone learned about the relationship the
father would be taken away, the home broken up, they would lose their
family and security, etc. and her feelings of guilt regarding any
previous relationship would be exposed.
This is all just superficial background. It wells from my own having
had one graduate course in psychoanalytic theory and working briefly as a
psychiatric social worker, so it is not that authoritative.
A seductive mother story would have been a more unusual story, and more
difficult to pull off. The only defense against infection of the
Electra or Oedipus complexes in a single parent home is the acceptance
of or conformity to a moral standard by the parent.
A number of advocate candidates for writing this, or similar stories,
turned me down because I told them I would be presenting what they
considered to be my biased analysis. In all cases, those who see evil
as good say/think they are arguing for good. That is all quite possible
in a TRIAD but this story, as well as the one in the previous chapter,
violated the rules of TRIADing. In the previous story the older male
had become both an authority and a TEAM member with his cousin.
I have presented these non-TRIADic stories, and this lengthy analysis
because the subtlety of evil is always a challenge. Those immersed in
it invariably see it as good and will either fail to see the violation
of the TRIADic principles or will challenge their validity.
|
|
No comments:
Post a Comment