Chapter Nine - Rating Your TRIAD On a Scale of 1-10

Chapter Nine -
Rating Your TRIAD
On a Scale of 1-10

Rating the quality of your TRIADs is, of course, subjective. I shall try to put together some concept of a scale but you will have to adjust/adapt it to your own perspectives. I would judge the first five levels to be applicable to temporary, or short-term, TRIADs formed at conferences and for low level longer term TRIADs that you use for daily purposes. Some critics of the book have said that there is nothing new about these levels and that they shouldn't really be called TRIADs at all, but I totally disagree because they are the useful entry point to ‘higher’ TRIADing. Not only are they the entry point, they also provide some basic TRIADing functions that other forms of social organization do not such that, by limiting the number of members to three, they limit the amount of internal interaction while still providing the structure for an extended and extensive network. Levels six to ten are the higher level TRIADs and what TRIADS should really be about. However, I think of this book as a basic introduction to TRIADs. Someday I hope someone will write a book about 'Higher Level Triading Made Simple', but I certainly don't imagine that it will be me. I have used the scale below, inadequate as it is, to rate the TRIAD stories at the end of the chapters. Because the concept of TRIADing is so new, it has been difficult for me to get writers to do stories with interactions in the way of the third individual critiquing, evaluating and commenting on the actions of the other pair. Particularly, for this to be taking place on the part of all three individuals simultaneously. In fact, I am sorry to say that I have provided no example of that. Perhaps such interaction is so involved it would require at least a novelette to do it justice. BASIC TRIAD Levels The TRIADs described at the Basic Level may be the only TRIADs held in mind by the original designator of the concept. Leastwise, I have found no reference or intimation elsewhere of anything beyond that. Others have said to me, "If you focus your thoughts back to those groups used for daily purposes, we see that the general concept of a TRIAD is not new at all; we have all been taking part in the successful use of the group dynamic, albeit unconsciously, all our lives." But no, in that I disagree. The great difference is that now we purposely limit the group to a total of three members because it creates a dynamic not found in larger groups. Moreover, the original proposers of the concept definitely saw and emphatically pointed out the effect that this new dynamic would have upon networks of TRIADS. Level 0 Not a TRIAD at all. Level 1 This is an introductory TRIAD where you have simply been assigned, or have chosen, to meet two other individuals and exchange your names plus perhaps some elementary information such as where you are from. Level 2 You develop contact information, such as for the duration of a conference, and meet together at times assigned by the conference program. Level 3 You establish sufficient rapport with your TRIAD members that you choose to voluntarily meet on other occasions, such as for breaks, and you become more acquainted with the personal background of your TRIAD members. Level 4 The TRIAD becomes functional to such an extent that you benefit each other by providing sources of information, analysis of whatever you’re working on, and so forth. This is the type of minimal assistance and interaction that you may get in community TRIADs such as clubs. There is not a lot of difference over what you might get from a group of friends other than, if it is well established, it may have higher reliability and more stability in that you each know what to expect. Level 5 This is the highest functional level that you may attain in a situation such as a conference. This level could be considered attained if, for example, you have found it so rewarding that you retain contact information so as to exchange information post conference. If the conference or situation is a regular occurrence you may plan to continue or renew your TRIAD at a later time. At this level, in your own community, you would personally know your TRIAD partners to the extent that you know where they live, some details about their family and things you need to consider in making requests of them. And they know much the same about you, in regards to both what they expect from you and what they offer to you. The Higher Level TRIADs The TRIADs described at the Basic Level may be the only TRIADs held in mind by the original designator of the concept. Leastwise, I have found no reference or intimation elsewhere of anything beyond that. Others have said to me, "If you focus your thoughts back to those groups used for daily purposes, we see that the general concept of a TRIAD is not new at all; we have all been taking part in the successful use of the group dynamic, albeit unconsciously, all our lives." But no, in that I disagree. The great difference is that now we purposely limit the group to a total of three members because it creates a dynamic not found in larger groups. Moreover, the original proposers of the concept definitely saw and emphatically pointed out the effect that this new dynamic would have upon networks of TRIADS. Level 6 You begin to dialog about each other's personal life circumstances, sympathizing and empathizing with each other's situation, looking for opportunities to assist each other. This is the first level at which each participant begins to try to assist the emotional relationship between the other two. Level 7 A deeper personal relationship is established that understands the quirks of the others' personalities and makes accommodation for it, trying to respond and be supportive to events in the others' life situations. Level 8 A recognized intentional effort by all parties to help each other achieve their goals and to maintain a good relationship with the other parties. Level 9 A mature attempt on the part of each member of the TRIAD to develop their own personal qualities of virtue combined with a purposeful attempt to assist both of the other parties in doing so. More specifically, a function of the unique TRIADic relationship is to try to encourage each of the other parties, to encourage each of other parties to assist the others in their critique and evaluation of the others. The repeated phrases in this statement are not redundant, they are iterative and are representative of the unique TRIADic ring-around-the-rosy relationship represented in the circular symbol on the front of this book and accompanying each TRIAD story. A further analogy of this essential TRIADic relationship could be that the three parties reflect their relationships to each other as does a mirror, in a mirror, in a mirror -- But, MOST IMPORTANTLY, a mirror of love and compassion. Of empathy and sympathy. Level 10 A deep personal interrelationship that may even be considered mystical in nature is achieved. Unity to the degree that the TRIAD itself is considered by the members as being an entity, the loss of which would be equivalent to a loss of self. The measures that I have suggested here may not be meaningful to another person, and there are others who may develop much more defined/refined measures that can be much more helpful. I hope that I may hear of them and include them in my own evaluative process. What I have written here will hopefully be more meaningful once you have read Section Two of this book. If the TRIAD concept becomes widely accepted and adopted then much greater insights will be developed as to its nature and how its implementation can be encouraged, enhanced and better utilized. I am not unaware of certain other social implications and potential ramifications in the widespread use of TRIADs as intimated in the conclusion of the story appended to Chapter Six. In Chapter Fourteen shall explore to some extent this potential. But, as I have said, how you rate your TRIADs will be a subjective matter of your own. I have no idea how the people in the following TRIAD would rate theirs but I have given them an 8.8. Back to the Land TRIAD by David Klein TRIAD Level Rating 8.8 Dave(A) is trying to pay off debt and survive in the post-housing-crash economy. Because he's older than the other two members of the TRIAD he is concerned about making the move toward self-sufficiency ASAP. Bob(B) is a middle-aged guy who is trying to leave the corporate world as a programmer and get back to the land, and otherwise "green" his lifestyle and survival trip. He's super intelligent and a bit irresponsible. Karen(C) is a web entrepreneur who works with Dave on a web site. She has removed herself one step away from the rat race that is California's Silicon Valley by moving to a country place where she's experimenting with a vegetable garden. She's ‘feistiness’ personified. Their TRIAD involves moving "back to the land" together. -------- A-(B.C) We have to start doing some serious looking for some land soon. The prices in California are still so high that I think we should look in Nevada or Oregon. B-A Chill, dude. Drop that East Coast attitude. You need to go out with Wade and me and meet some chicks. A-B It's easy for you to say since you can always go back and crash in your parents' super-big guest house when you go broke again. We're serious about this! Ease up on him, Dave. You're not perfect either. Listen, we have to get together on this one... C-(B/A)) …and yes, Bob, Dave's right. You can be a spoiled brat sometimes. And I don't know where the $80 bucks an hour you're making as a programmer is going, but I think I can guess. A-(B.C) Look, we're all from very different backgrounds, but we all want the same thing -- to make enough money to get back to the land. Bob, you're basically cool but you have to decide whether you're in or out, man. B-(A/C) O.k., I guess that's fair. It's just that I sometimes have a hard time with uptight Eastern types and super-bossy corporate chicks. C-(B/A) (She gives Bob a playful smack). FYI, Bob, I charge $200 an hour for that Freudian stuff and I'm not your Momma! C-(B.A) And guys, let's draw up a plan for the next year and pick a target date for getting that land. C-A) We really have to make this web site work if we're going to be able to afford that patch of land, Dave. So let's get down, clown!